I wanted to say more about what happened to me on Monday but that post was getting too long…

I like being in control. Whenever I drink alcohol, I do so slowly because I don’t like the buzz. Call me crazy but it makes me feel like I’m starting to loose control and I can’t stand that feeling. I don’t think I would like being drunk or getting high from any kind of drug. Even when I’ve taken pain medication, I can’t stand it.

What scared me so much on Monday was I had no control over what was happening to me. My heart was doing crazy things and I couldn’t do a thing about it. All I could do was pray.
I’m sure there is a lesson here for me to learn, I’m just not sure I want to learn it.